'Tis the Season...

To be jolly! To be bright! To wear outrageously ugly sweaters just for kicks!

That's right, it's sweater season, and to celebrate I've created yet another Sweater Boys calendar. Only this year, I'm selling them in an effort to try and raise money for Project Renew, an organization dedicated to helping families affected by cluster bombs in Vietnam. Check out the website I built, www.sweaterboys.com, and let me know what you think. If you'd like to buy a calendar and support a good cause this holiday season, you can buy one through sweaterboys.com or go directly to the link here.

Happy Holidays!

Me, Myself and Montana

There are just some places in this world that will always feel like home, and our family's ranch in Montana is one of those places for me. I recently made the most of some time off and spontaneously grabbed my camera, hopped in my car and drove up to the place (and the grandmother) I love dearly. Aside from being a recreational haven, it's a refuge for the soul. Once upon its ground, perspectives are cleared and life's little problems are put in their place. A sanctuary I hold dear to my heart, I can't imagine another place in this world that could ever match it for me.

Thank you, Grandma and Grandpa Talley, for building such a special place for your family to enjoy.

Untitled from Miaken Christensen on Vimeo.

Sweater Boys: 12 Months of Sheer Sweater Bliss

For those of you who missed our annual Sweater Soiree, just know that you totally missed out. JK! But you did. Alas, hopefully it helps knowing that we missed you!

This year's event was more thrilling than ever. A girl's coat caught on fire, unfounded rumors about my homemade wassail being spiked floated around the party, and the 2011 Sweater Boys calendar made it's debut! We estimated about 150 people showed throughout the night, but it doesn't seem fare that only they should view the stunning calendar portraits. So here it is, world--I present to you the 2011 Sweater Boys!

Mr. January


Mr. February


Mr. March


Mr. April


Mr. May


Mr. June:


Mr. July


Mr. August



Mr. September


Mr. October


Mr. November


Mr. December

Home Sweet Home

Most of you know I was born and raised in the great state of Kansas. But what some of you might not know is that Kansas is more than just wheat fields, Bob Dole and obesity. In fact, it's a rich source of social gems that I happily rediscovered on my recent trip back home.

For starters, Dad and I managed to hit up the farmer's market Saturday morning. Now, I realize farmer's markets are known for having unique (and occasionally quirky) merchandise, but this particular market far exceeded any I'd previously seen.

Take this lovely article of clothing, for example. Tired of being limited to just pants? Want all the dazzle of a skirt but the security of individual pant legs? Introducing the Pant-Skirt--Pirt, if you will. And I think you will.


After marveling at the Pirt for a while, I moved on to the 'yard' section of the market. It seems my people have discovered the newest trend in lawn-ornament decor: Tree Stumps. It's amazing that the rest of the world has for centuries overlooked these...thingies. I didn't catch the price but I'm sure they're worth every penny.


Other lawn decor items included clever/patriotic garden signs.


And what's a trip to the market without shopping the poo-bag section?


Here Dad is bartering with a couple who are passionate about eating buffalos. That passion must have been contagious because Dad bought about $50 in Buffalo Steaks.


Neither of us were sold on this, however.


These people had an unhealthy obsession with the Duke. That's literally all the booth had to offer--photos of John Wayne...and secretly I kind of wanted to buy one.


And of course, there was the kiddy area of the market, where a clown named 'Troubles' and a creepy lady with a chicken hat laughed and made balloon animals for the little girl in a halter-top with a fake tattoo.


So, needles to say, the market was splendid. Dad and I also managed to tour around the rural parts of Kansas a bit, visiting family along the way. Which is when I saw this.


We also visit a small town called Durham Kansas, with one operating business: a restaurant run by Menonite farmers that serves German food. My dad swears it's the place to be on a Friday night. Too bad it was Thursday.


I think the best part about the trip was spending time with my family. It just reminded me how important family is and how lucky I am to have such a great one. Here are some photos of the fam--unfortunately I didn't get everyone but these are still fun :).

Projects (as of late)

I was recently introduced to filmmaker Tyler Measom, who I've since discovered is incredibly talented and someone I am excited to learn a lot from. I'm working very part time for him to help promote his recently-finished film, Sons of Perdition. It's an amazing, heartwarming documentary about three boys exiled from Warren Jeffs' polygamous compound in Colorado City, AZ, and it's already caught the attention of Oprah (she acquired the film to be part of her upcoming Documentary Film Club)!

When it finally does get a theatrical release, I would highly recommend going to see it. It will make you want to get involved and help those kids. Here's a link to the trailer in case you're interested.


Also, the three boys featured in the film are now living in Salt Lake City. Having to fend for themselves, they are always looking for work. If anyone knows of any kind of construction job that opens up, let me know. They are all hard workers and have a lot of experience doing pretty much any kind of construction project.

I'm back!

Artist Profile: Zachary Proctor from Miaken Christensen on Vimeo.So I realized that basically no one reads the blog on my little portfolio site, so I've come crawling back to this one in hopes of re-connecting with you guys! Plus I want your feedback on my work.

Speaking of which, guess who's got a new mini-profile piece? Here's the latest one I did for Mondo Fine Art. Feel free to offer feedback--likes, dislikes, ideas for my next one--as I always find it really helpful.

Artist Profile: Zachary Proctor from Miaken Christensen on Vimeo.

New Blog

Hi Everybody,

Just thought I'd let you know that I have a new blog I'll be posting to at www.miaken.com. If you want you can check it out sometime! Not a lot up yet but working on it...

Happy Blogging!

Bring on the Bangkok

With Trent's recent medical issues, we've been tied to Bangkok until he is better. We are going on our 10th day here, and Trent's progress is slow but somewhat steady. All in all, we're just glad he's alive and on the road to recovery.

That said, we've had a LOT of time to kill here. Conor hopped a plain to Taipei to visit some friends, leaving Jentry and I to explore the city and find ways to entertain ourselves.

One way we do that is by finding Chenglish phraseology on items sold throughout the city. Chenglish is a word Conor uses to describe the broken-English phrases placed on t-shirts and other products by Asian marketing gurus. The goal, I presume, is to connect with Americans and those fascinated by American culture. The beauty of Chenglish (or in this case I guess it would be Thailish) is that the words are often random and make absolutely no sense whatsoever, causing copious amounts of laughter from the likes of me and Jentry.

For example. The other day I was at the market and found this little gem. 

I rain cloud UK. Um...what? I don't think anyone really knows what this means, but apparently it sounded good when they went to print. Also, the Grocery Store brand description is very helpful, as shown below.

Today at the Grand Palace (one of Bangkok's biggest tourist attractions) Jentry noticed another diamond in the rough--the Mickey Mouse umbrella. Only, the locals seem to have come up with their own words to describe the American icon.

Somehow I don't think 'Lovely Rat' would have gone over as well with American kids. I can see it now: "Who's the leader of the club that's made for you and me...L-O-V-E-L-Y R-A-T!"

But the real find, in my opinion, was a beauty product I spotted at a street vendor stall. At first glance, it looks like any other product.

But after giving it a second look, I realized it was actually quite special. See for yourself.

I was baffled as to what a horniness-eliminating cream actually did, and I wasn't sure why it also mentioned whitening. Did it simultaneously eliminate sex drive and plaque? So i asked the vendor lady. She sampled it on my hand and I realized it was an exfoliating body scrub. I guess the best word they could come up with to describe rough skin was horny, hence the anti-horniness messaging. 

You too can dispel horniness in 30 seconds! Perfect for engaged couples.

Reading the usage descriptions was equally enjoyable. 

I'm guessing Asians find it equally humorous when they see Americans walking around with those Chinese symbol tattoos which they think say 'faith' or 'serenity' but in reality say something like, 'I is happy making' or 'smiling I do'. 

Anyway, in addition to Thailish novelties, we've managed to take in some of the cool local attractions as well. Bangkok is actually a really cool city. And even though we are here indefinitely and it's hard at times because everything is so up in the air, we've managed to find some new area of the city to explore each day. Here are a few photos from our exploration... 

 

Grand Palace grounds

Emerald Buddha

Ornate decor on exterior of temples

Jentry in front of a temple that is completely gold.

Beautiful white temples on the grounds.

Street vendors line the sidewalks of Bangkok.

Sukhumvit 7/1. One of many interesting side streets throughout the city.

Enjoying the best chicken schwarma sandwich ever. When we asked for the menu, an Egyptian guy looked at us, then pointed at the two skewers and said, "I have beef. I have Chicken. I am Muhammad." I opted for Chicken.

How do, Hanoi?

So we made it. After almost a year of planning, we finally arrived in Hanoi, the first stop along our two-month itinerary. 

As soon as we exited the plane, we were welcomed to the country, given surgical masks, and our temperatures were taken. Swine flu really has these people paranoid--they even escorted someone off the plane to quarantine him.

So far, I've seen and smelled and tasted things I didn't know existed. For example; I didn't know there was a place in the world where people boil duck eggs just before they hatch and eat them. But apparently baby duck fetuses are a real hit in Hanoi, so naturally we had to try one (and naturally I almost puked). We also tried some silkworms, which were surprisingly tasty. It's like pork in worm form.

There are literally hundreds of thousands or motorcycles here. It's like this glorified biker gang at all times. People ride them into buildings, on sidewalks, and park them wherever they want. There aren't really traffic laws here, so they do whatever they can to just keep moving forward, which results in some chaotic driving experiences. They carry astronomical amounts of crap on them, also. So far we've seen people carrying 20-ft long rhubarb, 8-10 large boxes, trees and even a stash of 8 live pigs on motorcycles at various times.

Another random gem of the trip: our hotel was rented out by the 30-or-so Norwegians who live here to celebrate National Norwegian Day. We kind of crashed the party, but they were warm and welcoming and asked us to join in the fun while a magician performed. The awesome factor of this was very high, but I'll let the picture speak for itself.

But, of course, one of the most significant highlights so far was walking into a restaurant our first day in Hanoi and seeing the cutest weiner dog ever! It looked like a bigger version of Lenny, named Colin. Conor decided it was a good omen. He was so friendly with all of us but decided he liked Conor as more than a friend and proceeded to hump his leg throughout dinner. 

We've successfully documented school children, crazy street life, and feedback from two of Hanoi's most knowledgeable Americans/ex-pats, Lady Borton and Chuck Searcy. Jentry has written about them at http://southeastasiadoc.blogspot.com/ (he will be documenting most of the trip, and he's already posted an amazing entry. Pretty much all the photographs I'll be using are taken by him and Conor, both of whom are fantastic photographers).